It seems that most of my complex emotional issues/problems or just plain old feelings stem from actually giving a shit.
So not one more shit shall be given!
It's just too much effort to give a crap about what I look like, what people think of me, if I'm saying the right things, what that person feels, etc. So I'm giving up on giving a shit.
It's not like any of it has any meaning or purpose anyway.
It's been about one week so far and I already feel pretty damn mellow and a bit less stressed out. This could be due to excessive partying though. Right now I'm on painkillers for my alcohol induced headache so I'm cruising along watching Doctor Who.
P.S. I'm starting at Season 5 and working my way backwards. It seems appropriate.
Tuesday, February 15, 2011
Saturday, February 5, 2011
Don't Touch My Breasts
So tonight I had a friend grab one of my breasts. And no one cared.
I was given a hug from behind and then realised that one hand was firmly gripping my right breast. I removed it, firmly saying no, and stepped out from the hug.
No one else seemed to care that this had been done to me. What, has groping become acceptable and I missed the memo? Not only this but even when I brought it up later, that person said that it didn't matter, they enjoyed it. Everyone else just brushed it off.
Sorry, but my body is not there for just anyone to do with what they please. You may not touch my breasts, buttocks or genitals unless I give you permission. It is NOT acceptable to grope someone, even if you are friends.
Having a friend do this makes it even worse because if I'm not safe around friends, who am I safe around?
I was given a hug from behind and then realised that one hand was firmly gripping my right breast. I removed it, firmly saying no, and stepped out from the hug.
No one else seemed to care that this had been done to me. What, has groping become acceptable and I missed the memo? Not only this but even when I brought it up later, that person said that it didn't matter, they enjoyed it. Everyone else just brushed it off.
Sorry, but my body is not there for just anyone to do with what they please. You may not touch my breasts, buttocks or genitals unless I give you permission. It is NOT acceptable to grope someone, even if you are friends.
Having a friend do this makes it even worse because if I'm not safe around friends, who am I safe around?
Thursday, February 3, 2011
Caring Sucks
The world, or at least, human society, is not doing very well.
I don't pretend to know everything about this - I only stopped being apathetic about a year and a half ago myself. And I am certain that I am the minority.
Most people don't care about poverty, racism, sexism, inequality, homophobia, the environment, human rights, diseases, education.... Or they pretend to and don't do anything; "It wouldn't make a difference anyway". They create a barrier and distance themselves from the thought of global issues, figuring that they are 'someone else's' problem, that the government or 'some kind soul' will do their share of the caring and work.
I digress.
Once you are a part of the caring minority, the people who see these problems and are angered and saddened by them and wish to do something, what CAN you do?
Again, I am only new to these horrible, worldwide, disgusting, taken-as-the-norm, things. And what have I done then? Well, last year I:
And yet.
And yet I feel that I am not doing enough. I KNOW that I am not doing enough (otherwise the world would be fixed, right?). This eats away at me every day.
So, in my long-winded way, I am asking for your help. I want advice. How do YOU deal with these feelings of guilt? What do YOU do to improve the world?
Or do you not even care?
I don't pretend to know everything about this - I only stopped being apathetic about a year and a half ago myself. And I am certain that I am the minority.
Most people don't care about poverty, racism, sexism, inequality, homophobia, the environment, human rights, diseases, education.... Or they pretend to and don't do anything; "It wouldn't make a difference anyway". They create a barrier and distance themselves from the thought of global issues, figuring that they are 'someone else's' problem, that the government or 'some kind soul' will do their share of the caring and work.
I digress.
Once you are a part of the caring minority, the people who see these problems and are angered and saddened by them and wish to do something, what CAN you do?
Again, I am only new to these horrible, worldwide, disgusting, taken-as-the-norm, things. And what have I done then? Well, last year I:
- went vegan
- contributed US$363.89 to Kiva (24 loans)
- gave $240 to the Wilderness Society
- gave $50 to Oxfam
- gave $105.60 to Uproar
- gave $11.50 to Movember
- signed numerous petitions and wrote numerous emails
- changed what I'm studying
- tried to educate myself further
And yet.
And yet I feel that I am not doing enough. I KNOW that I am not doing enough (otherwise the world would be fixed, right?). This eats away at me every day.
So, in my long-winded way, I am asking for your help. I want advice. How do YOU deal with these feelings of guilt? What do YOU do to improve the world?
Or do you not even care?
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